Ask Dr. Bill and Ms. Lola - May 2009

Dear Dr. Bill and Miss Lola,

I have a problem! I really like this guy, but I don't want to. He annoys me and he's head over heels about a different girl, but he's hilariously fun to be around! He talks about the girl he likes and asks for advice. AAAAHHH!!! Help!

Sincerely,

Exasperated

Dear Exasperated,

If you were malicious, you would try to break up this guy and his girlfriend. This is the natural response that many girls would have, and generally, for short-term happiness, it works! If you choose this path, temporary success will be automatically at your fingertips. That is, until he is snatched away from you by another girl haunted by that green-eyed monster of jealousy. You might also be setting yourself up for more sinister acts in the future, such as grand theft auto or extortion. There aren't many steps between stealing a man's heart and a man's car. At this stage of life, if you are truly looking for a lasting relationship, you should find a different guy. Forget him and find a more hunkly and gorgeous man to spend the rest of your life with.

Sincerely,
Dr. Bill

Dear Exasperated,

First off, calm down, take a deep breath, and think. If this guy and the girl he's always talking about aren't really dating steady or even involved at all, then why not tell him how you feel about him? If all their relationship consists of his him talking about how much he likes her, then maybe you've got a chance. On the flip side, if you're his friend and you tell him how you really feel about him, there's the chance he'll feel uncomfortable and won't want to be around you anymore. Also, you're contradicting yourself: does he annoy you or is he fun to be around? If it's both, then there's another problem. When you're friends and he's annoying you you can always walk away or tell him to knock it off. If your relationship gets serious, little things become huge, and you'll be around each other much more often. In conclusion, think about this a lot before you do something you might regret later.

Cordially,

Miss Lola

Dear Dr. Bill and Miss Lola,

Recently I tried out for a position in student council that I had been working for all year. I found out that I didn't make the cut and now I've become depressed. I've tried not thinking about it, but a lot of my friends made it and I see them wherever I go. What should I do to stop myself from feeling so down?

Sincerely,

Council Cut-out

Dear Council Cut-out,

Well, at least now you know how Hillary feels! Then again, she is now the Secretary of State. As a council reject myself, I went through the exact same thing last year. Thankfully, there's absolutely nothing that a day's worth of sleep, a Buffy the Vampire Slayer marathon, and a tub of Vanilla Secret Delight ice cream can't cure. It took me an entire weekend, but I got over it. However, I have friends from last year who still aren't over it. (Too bad they don't know how much exhilaration watching Sarah Michelle Gellar beat up vampires can give them). But mm-- Vanilla Secret Delight. So delicious. Just watch how much you eat: It goes straight to your thighs.

Sincerely, Dr. Bill

Dear Cut-out,

Having never tried out for student council myself, I cannot fully understand your situation, but I have gone through similar things. This may not be what you want to hear, but I've found that moping about and feeling sorry for myself does me no good whatsoever - it just depresses me. Look back on the situation. Did you have fun? Did you enjoy the time you spent doing it? Did you learn things about "politics" and more importantly about yourself? If you can answer yes to any or even all of these questions then you got something positive out of the experience. Also, this may sound a bit harsh, but you're being slightly self-centered if all you can think about when you see your friends is that you didn't make it. Try to feel happy for them and show them that you're glad they made it. I understand that you're going through a huge letdown, but there's no point in crying over spilled milk. If you are going to be a junior or a sophomore, try for another position next year. If you're a senior next year, there's always college student government awaiting beyond the summer break. I know it's easy to sit around moping and feeling sorry for yourself, heck, I've done it plenty of times. However, it really doesn't do anything but make you feel worse. Let go of your disappointment - you can't change the situation. Move on and try to enjoy the rest of your high school experience. Just because you didn't make student council doesn't mean that you're a failure. You will still go on to have an amazing year and do great things.

Cordially,

Miss Lola


As always, take the counsel of Dr. Bill and Ms. Lola with careful consideration (especially Bill).